I wrote the statement below when I had just come out of hospital. That was 6 months ago and things have changed even more (for the better) since then. I follow a plant based diet. Which for me means I don’t eat meat or dairy. I also don’t eat any refined sugar. Cutting these 3 products out of my diet has had an amazing impact on my general wellbeing. I will be starting a course in Naturopathic Nutrition at the end of March at CNM and hope to eventually become a Nutritional Therapist! I am creating this blog to give other diabetics and non diabetics nutritional information, recipes and to let people know not only what hurdles someone with an autoimmune disease can face but what can be done to overcome them.

I came out of hospital 5 weeks ago yesterday. I went into hospital because i had been skipping injections for almost a year and i no longer felt like i was in my own body. I had just come back from a weeks holiday in Croatia. I had no energy whilst i was away, I couldn’t even walk for 5 minutes without drinking 5 coffees. My hair was falling out at such a rate that i felt like i looked like Albert Einstein in the mornings (I also lost most of my eyebrows/eyelashes/leg hair), my legs had become numb, almost hollow and my feet would swell up so much i could barely fit my fit into my shoes. I couldn’t concentrate at work (my work colleagues had no idea what was going on) and felt so stupid when I couldn’t remember what i was doing or what someone had asked me to do as my mind was so foggy and the song “I can see clearly now” was on a loop in my head. In hospital the doctors asked if I had taken an overdose of battery acid as my body was in such a state. I had cut out all of my friends as it seemed easier to do this as then i didn’t have to face up to what i was doing to my body. My mind was taken over by food. “What was i going to eat next? how was i going to cope if i put on a bit of weight? People think (or i think) i’m more attractive when i’m skinny”. I could see all of my friends moving on around me and i felt trapped. I guess the reason I went into hospital was because I had forgotten what it was like to live. I had become so consumed with myself that i had overlooked the smallest things that make you happy, Reading for example, i didn’t have enough concentration to read one page, let alone absorb any information and i used to be an avid reader. After the doctors told me if i had left coming into hospital a day or two later they didn’t think i would have come in alive, I knew it was time to stop destroying my body. There is alot more i could write about my reasons for me starting to do this to myself but what i think is more important, is for me to tell you how it feels to be alive. The first time I was able to get back on a bike (within 4 days) and to cycle around a lake brought me to tears. Listening to music whilst walking around London and taking in the city, filled my body and mind with excitement. Watching my body shape change, as strange as it sounds, although I have found it difficult putting on weight, I now have strength. I am able to open a jar of olives or do a spin class or walk up a flight of stairs without feeling knackered. HAIR, I now have hair growing back in places i forgot I had it and I do look a bit like Pat Sharp (for those of you who don’t know who he is google “Pat Sharp mullet”) I am seeing a psychologist. I am about to start “group therapy”, I am doing yoga, going to the gym. I’ve become a vegan, this has had a massive effect (a good one) on my blood sugars. Yes, it is hard sometimes, there have been quite a few days over the last month or so when i haven’t gotten out of bed and i’ve cried and have thought there is no way out. BUT, it’s been the little changes that have pulled me through this. Writing a list of all of the positive’s that come from injecting correctly has helped me alot. Having friends and family around me that love me for me. An “Are you ok?” text from a friend can often bring me out of my dark mood. PEOPLE CARE and this is what is so important to remember. I do worry about the impact that not injecting has had on my body. My feet are still swollen sometimes and hurt alot so I can’t walk as far or as quickly as I would like. I’m lucky. For some people it could be worse at this stage. On the other hand though, I saw a rose bush the other day and I was so overwhelmed by how bloody beautiful it was that I cried.”


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s